Posts RSS Comments RSS 237 Posts and 1,572 Comments till now

Archive for January, 2009

Ode to the Moth in My Rice Jar

Oh, delicate little brown moth
Fluttering in my jar of organic rice
You’ve painted me a housekeeping sloth
And surely, we shall not meet twice.
For while ‘tis true I want to eat organic –
Only whole, healthy, grass-fed food
Grown without the use of pesticide –
Finding you there was so traumatic
That no matter what the greater good
Creepy-crawlies in rice I can’t abide.

It’s true organic farming is best
Unless there is no diversity of crops.
Then it’s just a corporate nest
A farm that’s just a prop
For another brand that produces crap –
“Food” with odd ingredients
And words we can’t pronounce.
Just an over-processed nutritional trap
We eat with blind obedience
And now we must renounce.

Oh, little moth, what to do isn’t simple!
Wish you well and welcome you in,
Or compromise my principles?
Either way, I cannot win.
On one thing, however, I’m very clear
As I empty my jar into the compost
Then on it soapily linger
As much as I hold all creatures dear
The thing I did first and foremost
Was squash you under my finger.

PETA arranges release of ancient lobster from NY restaurant

A NY restaurant was keeping “George” the 20 lb, 80-140 year-old lobster as a sort of mascot, but PETA intervened on the lobster’s behalf and convinced the restaurant to release George into protected waters off the coast of Maine.

As George was being taken away in his pimped out ice-lined foam cooler, the other lobsters were pressing their antennae against the glass of the tank, wistfully. One four-year-old lobster was heard calling to PETA representatives, “What about me? I have my whole life ahead of me!”